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Spiritual Injuries,

Traumatic Assaults on the Soul

http://www.johnrolandhigh.com/

My Definition of

 ©Spiritual Injuries

*©Spiritual Injuries are the often conscious and willful attempts to deliberately degrade and diminish the development of the psyche of the child/ person and thereby alter and or re-direct the ongoing moral developmental stages of the moral, psychological and physiological structure of the mental, social and behavioral presentations of the individual (s), group, race, culture and their very livelihood.  Spiritual injuries are an attempt (s) to change and render ones complete character, sense of well-being and dependence to something or someone outside of themselves, in a dominating effort to subjugate and take over control of the person.

   Being analogous to Battered Women’s Syndrome (BWS) Battered Men’s Syndrome and Battered Children’s Syndrome (see Appendix M) and Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) (see Appendix H), Spiritual Injuries describes someone who currently is or has been the victim of ongoing, consistent repeatedly severe violence to the point where this violence results in Psychological Trauma, the overwhelming demands placed upon the psychological system that results in a profound felt sense of vulnerability and/ or loss of control (van der Kolk and McFarlane, 1996.)  This is to include myriad forms of violence as in domestic violent intrusions, as mentioned earlier, and/ or consistent and repeated attempts at diminishing and degrading ones ego and self-esteem and survival systems.(see Appendix O, Psychological Trauma, The Human Stress Continuum).

Children are born vulnerable to the behaviors of their parents, caretakers and remain vulnerable throughout their latency stage, preadolescent, adolescent to their young adulthood.  Often, adverse early childhood experiences have a far-reaching impact on the children’s developmental stages.  Because of its sometimes subtle applications, Spiritual Injuries are often denied by the victim (s) who often expresses guilt and makes excuses for the abuser/ victimizer, relying on their hope, optimism and on their resiliency to recover from the abuse, and because of developmental circumstances, remain with their abuser.  In an attempt to escape their abuse, children often run away from home (a clear notice that “something is wrong in Denmark.”) 

       Unfortunately, even Social Services often miss or ignore these signs of abuse, often returning the children and adolescents to their family of origin or to a foster family, where often the cycle of Spiritual Injuries abuse begins over again.  This cycle occurs repeatedly, showing a pattern of abuse occurs in families, cultural groups, races, and is both episodic, generational and inter-generational.  This pattern of abuse is not limited to women and girls, but to boys and men, also. Men are not educated to perceive themselves as victims, and are often taught “grow up and be a man” that they are strong, tough, masculine and strong.

      Developmentally, the child needs its mother or caretaker through at least age three.  It is during this stage that the child is trying to find security and safety in its environment and is constantly looking at the mother/caretaker for repeated assurances.  This begins the affect regulation physiological stages for the child.  If the mother/caretaker is unavailable due to post-partum depression or is just too busy with other things and other children, the child suffers enormously as it is during this stage that the mother/ caretaker absolutely has to be there with unconditional love, that is, almost always undivided attention.  Since the child is wired for this stage, it has no alternative but to seek out these assurances from the mother/caretaker as it is absolutely impossible for a child during this stage to be in a position of fending for him/herself.

     In development courses, you see children during this stage seeking assurances but not getting them.  They indicate their frustrations by excessive wetting or urinating, crying, often kicking with their feet and hands as though they are indeed have a hard time.  Often the mother/caretaker ignores these attempts at attention0seeking of the infant, to the developmental peril of the child, and very often you will observe that the child at certain points is beginning to give up on having their needs met by the mother/caretaker.  This is often indicated by the varying intonations in their voices when they are crying and in despair.  To the daring ear and eye, it is readily observable and noticeable that the child is in despair and at the stage when it is giving up on having its needs met.

     In later life, these are the children that are abused and neglected, physically and sexually assaulted and abused, and are as adults today, in our institutions such as prisons, psychiatric wards, or court proceedings.  All of this, I believe, is a result of the lack of unconditional live during the first stages of life, birth to three years.  Further, these children most always find themselves in poor relationships with others, marriages or otherwise, as they do not have the ability to receive love as well as give it because in the very prime stages of their life, they were not exposed to the mother’s/caretaker’s unconditional love.

    Recovery from Trauma

“The core experiences of psychological trauma are disempowerment and disconnection from others. Recovery, therefore, is based upon the empowerment of the survivor and the creation of new connections. Recovery can take place only within the context of relationships; it cannot occur in isolation. In her renewed connections with other people, the survivor re-created the psychological faculties that were damaged or deformed by the traumatic experience. These faculties include the basic capacities for trust, autonomy, initiative, competence, identity, and intimacy. Just as these capabilities are originally formed in relationships with other people, they must be reformed in such relationships.

      The first principle of recovery is the empowerment of the survivor. She must be the author and arbiter of her own recovery. Others may offer advice, support, assistance, affection, and care, but not cure. Many benevolent and well-intentioned attempts to assist the survivor founder because this fundamental principle of empowerment is not observed. No intervention that takes power away from the survivor can possibly foster her recovery, no matter how much it appears to be in her immediate best interest. In the words of an incest survivor, “Good therapists are those who really validated my experience and helped me to control my behavior rather than trying to control me.” (Herman 1992, 133)

______________

Resilience

          Ability to bounce back from trauma and get on with life.  Learn from negative experiences and translate them into positive ones.

 Resilient children are not invulnerable to trauma or immune to suffering.  They find ways to cope, set goals, and achieve their goals despite myriad obstacles like drug-addicted parent, dire poverty, or physical disabilities thrown into their paths.

 Being resilient does not mean a life without risks or adverse conditions, but rather learning how to deal effectively with inevitable stresses of life.

 There is no such thing as life free of losses and setbacks.

People who lack resilience are less able to rise above adversity or learn from their mistakes and move on.  Instead of focusing on what they can control and accepting responsibility for their lives, they waste time and energy on matters beyond their control.

As a result, the circumstances of their lives leave them feeling helpless and hopeless and prone to depression.

 When things go wrong or don’t work out as expected, they tend to think “I can’t do this” or even worse, “It can’t be done.”

 Children learn to become resilient under parents and guardians who enable and encourage them to figure things out for themselves and take responsibility for their actions.  They need to learn that they are capable of finding their own way.

   Parents who are too quick to take over a task when their children complain “I can’t do this” or children learn from their mistakes.

Resilience

 Ability to bounce back from trauma and get on with life

    Learn from negative experiences and translate them into positive ones.

  Resilient children are not invulnerable to trauma or immune to suffering.  They find ways to cope, set goals, and achieve their goals despite myriad obstacles like drug-addicted parents, dire poverty, or physical disabilities thrown into their paths.

   Being resilient does not mean a life without risks or adverse conditions, but rather learning how to deal effectively with inevitable stresses of life.

 There is no such thing as life free of losses and setbacks.

People who lack resilience are less able to rise above adversity or learn from their mistakes and move on.

 Instead of focusing on what they can control and accepting responsibility for their lives, they waste time and energy on matters beyond their control.

As a result, the circumstances of their lives leave them feeling helpless and hopeless and prone to depression.

John Roland High,

Author and Trauma Clinician

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